see through, not clear enough..

even when you think things might have been see through, to some people they'll never be transparent enough. you didn't see me, you never saw me, you only saw what you needed to see.. and now you claim i was out of sight. when i know that i was all in your line of visual. waiting, longing.. for a word or maybe a glance that might reveal some of you inner thoughts. i know you, i know the way your thoughts work their way through your head.. i think you were afraid to see me.. you feared that you would want for yourself what was entering through your eyes and slowly warming your heart.

countless moments your eyes captured mine, and for seconds there was nothing else. how can a single path of eye contact generate such heat to ignite your cheeks as well as mine. and i fell in love with the way your eyes wandered over to mine, the way you saw me without seeing, the way you spoke without words, and the way you touched my heart with your hand. the way we engraved ourselves in each others memories forever. and i tried to find a way to your heart, a loud way.. that could be shouted into the wind with no use for words; but i never found the key to the doors of matters of the heart. for i think your heart didn't keep the key, but your head hid it well from what people would think, what was expected. my heart kindled for yours, and time passed, bodies interposed between us, but still glances transfixed. my head tumbles as i try to remember what was shaken everytime i felt you near, what would plummet at every disappointment.

i wanted you for myself for so long that i didn't know how to want something else. i think i'll always want you for myself. but like all must pass i gave you up, you left me no other choice, it hurt me deeply.. scarring me.. deeply. and now, years passed you tell me all that could have been, and how you could of been mine, and these eyes could have been yours. but i think my heart will never beat twice the way it did. for see through is not clear enough, and a heart can't take twice a kindle of sight so dear to me.